Saturday, November 8, 2008

All the leaves are brown

It's definitely fall here as the pile of leaves waiting to be picked up in our backyard attests. They were beautiful when they changed colors yet stayed on the trees. I'm waiting for the final leaves to fall off so I don't have to rake twice and also for it to stop raining!
The rain is nice though. Earlier in October I posted about planting grass seed in the dead spots of our front yard. Well I no longer have to put the sprinklers on it since the rain is watering my little seedlings and they have filled in the patches so nicely. I have little green sprouts all over the patches I did in the front lawn.

Unfortunately I only got around to doing half the front lawn. It was tiring work! Plus it started raining. I figure the lawn is not really a focal point throughout winter and the next prime opportunity to plant is spring time anyways.
This is me: I always have a few halfway finished projects.
Last week I was folding a bunch of laundry and in my mind I'm like this is boring... maybe I'll come back and finish it later. But then I told myself... Sunshine you are doing it again... you are going to come back in 30 minutes and look at this pile of clothes and think what possessed me to not complete that task??? Since I really had nothing else pressing to do so I made myself complete it.
I leave things halfway done all the time. Like I will unload half the dishwasher. and Clean half of the house. And do half the laundry...

I have been making a window box to go over our back doors for a few years now. A couple years ago I bought the wood and screwed a nice little box together. Then I hit a roadblock and left it sitting in the garage for two years. A few weeks ago I finally covered it with fabric and it is almost ready to go up. But what is it doing? it's sitting in our spare room now. Because I haven't put one final touch on it and I can't find the brackets to hang it anymore and I know I bought them a few years ago.... The eye opener on the window box came when Gene was home from Afganistan and I mentioned the possibility of him helping me hang the thing. He said: Oh you are still making that box? I think I helped you with that last time I was home on leave. So now I have a goal. Have it hung by the time Gene comes home.... 11 months or so away. That might be a bit speedier than the pace I have been going.

Yesterday I looked at my charts I had to still chart on and thought.... maybe I'll go do something else before I finish charting. So I went to talk to one of the Pediatricians about a case. Halfway there I noticed several of the docs had already left including her.... and I thought to myself.... Sunshine: you are going to be here all night if you keep avoiding charting... you could be done by now!
Plus poor Brian was calling me sick at home. Our first cold is upon us. I have a touch of it but it always seems to hit Brian more. He wanted me to bring home food.... and what am I doing... ignoring my charts while the person I love is home, miserable, and waiting for me.
So I'm proud to say I finished my charts in about 15 minutes!

Anyways. Work is still going well. I had a day where I walked out so excited about my job and just feeling like I made the best decision in the world by choosing to work there. Yesterday I had one particularly difficult patient where my supervising physician pointed out a few things on her extensive med list that I should be thinking about that I wasn't and I had a great learning experience. I'm finding in this profession that I have to humble myself. it is inevitable that I will make mistakes and when I realize them I have a tendency to want to just hide them and hope my patient miraculously gets better and no one notices that I made the mistake. But I can't do that. So several times this week I've noticed something minor I should have done differently and sucked it up and called the patient... Umm... Mr. So and so... I reviewed your case a little more and there was one thing I thought we should do differently.

Why can't I just do everything perfectly??

1 comment:

Chelsea said...

You started work! Glad you like it. Don't be so hard on yourself.